The Duchy of Grand Fenwick Vs Chicago

A month from now, the “Windy City” will be air drying  after the “Mouse that Roared” is gone. (sorry Chicago)

BlogHer ’09 will have blown through and the interwebs will be all “a-twitter” with tales of who did what to whom, how many cheeseburgers were eaten in a drunken stupor, who wore what, whose sponsors rocked, whose sponsor floppedZappos, Avelle (Bag Borrow or Steal) and a myriad of other popular online retailers have been inundated with orders for new shoes, handbags, accessories and more to be “shown” off at the event. Women have been wii-fit working out, shredding, dieting, reinventing, I’d bet there’s been some cosmetic surgery, some botox and other not so subtle changes. The printing business has been ramped up for printing business cards (really, you need a business card? for what? you’re a business?) And lest we forget, the Poken. Oh my goodness.  Picture a full grown adult conference attendee at any other conference with one of these. (Well I’m sorry but I cannot help but laugh at the childish images the product inspires) Although the concept is a great one..something went missing in the implementation. Unless of course they were picturing their target market as 8-10 year olds. (read Butterball and Real Simple  from BlogHer ’07) and well you get the drift.

The sheer giddyness of young women, anxious to visit another city (or downtown in their home town) is almost palpable.  I’ve read more than my fair share of posts about the conference.  Funny, I actually read these blathers.  I’ve poured through hundreds of posts, looking for a story, some semblance of a story, from a woman who will be attending.  The veterans of Blogher have a more calm outlook on the event, but even still, they’re somewhat awestruck.

I’m still looking for some  “real” content with relation to this event. Some compelling story.  More beg than bite, is what I’m finding. Leaves me with an icky feeling. Kind of like the pan handler at the freeway exit in a town I don’t often visit.  You know the one, the guy with the sign “Stranded. Will Work For Food” and his dog, who faithfully sits on the traffic island with his master.

Don’t worry, I’m not gonna do what you all think I’m gonna do, which is, you know, FLIP OUT! But, in this crazy world we live in,  honor and transparency is what we’re looking for, everywhere. Being an ambassador of what Rod Tidwell called “kwan” (love, respect, community… and the dollars too) say: coin, is what I do and I’m finding the whole thing just a bit smarmy.

And This Is Where I Offend Everyone Else

I have issues with the overt exclusion of male panelists and participants.

(Other than as “arm candy” for those brave enough to  parade their significant other or rented partners.) If another conference in the blogging world tried this tact in reverse and didn’t have women as participants and panelists and speakers, well Katy bar the door and woe be to them. The masses of feminsts and quasi feminists would be up in arms and on the attack against the male chauvinistic conference and their so called  double standards. Some how, BlogHer gets away with the “girls club”.  There’s nothing uniquely feminine about the act or art of blogging.  And frankly men are as good or better at WOMM as women are.  If the purpose of the event is to help bloggers, why not take an equality stance? (Oh I get that you’ve added the token male break out. That saves your butts with the civil rights bunch) Take down the “no boys allowed sign” (the one that’s up unless you’re an uber blogger like Kawasaki or Scoble) dispense with the references to vaginas (its really not cute anymore) and who has one or not and lets get down to the true business of blogging.  And just for the record, Blogqueers?  I’m not a member of the LGBT community and I find this title beyond derisive. Maybe you’re trying to be umm hip or cool, but lets call it like it its. That’s just not acceptable in the professional world. Anywhere else and the LGBT community would be filing charges against you for discriminatory speech. Did you even run the session titles by your legal department?

I have issues with Chevrolet being a major sponsor when my tax dollars have been spent to keep this flailing company afloat.  Providing cars for carpools and swag may seem small in the grand scheme, but GM you just let go of a major portion of your dealerships. Because they weren’t making money for you, you said. They were costing you money.  Ummmm, *cough*

More issues come to light with  companies like J&J, who managed to offend the femme blogging world back a few months, with the Motrin Moms debaucle.This reeks of  damage control more than honest support, sorry.  And yeah, I gave it a rest. You brought it back with your sponsorship here.

And WalMart, you know they have the 11 Moms group, what’s it called again? Rob & Mike plus 20 or more now. (Shampoos and laptops and trips, oh my!) Who are you kidding here? Pandering to the audience you’re chasing in my view isn’t winning any points with my demographic. (Yeah, I’m not in your target marketwomen and community isn’t exactly in your “realm” of thinking. Walmart, but you get my paycheck every month, go figure.)You’ve ignored my bracket with product offerings, participation in your programs and more. You see dear WalMart, I’m an income earner, a decision maker in my own right. Maybe,  I should learn to ignore you. After all, it still seems you care more about the almighty dollar than women and community isn’t exactly in your “realm” of thinking. More damage control?

Wiley Publishers? What? The next hot seller, Women’s Conferences For Dummies? or Cliff Notes to Mommy Blogging 101?(you might have wanted to investigate Butterball’s ’07 sponsorship issues first)

Ray Kotcher…I’m a little agast here. You have a bang up team of folks who target bloggers for participation in your influence and buzz programs. What’s to be gained here?  Buzz for you? Nah…you’re not in need of  thousands of women chirping about YOUR brand.  Your people have continued to shine as you now have 112 Silver Anvil Awards for the best in strategic public relations planning and execution. (Did you put that guy up to living in IKEA?) Looking through the list many of the major sponsors happen to be clients of yours (Read: Liberty Mutual, Green Works, and Tropicana to name a few) ..I’m presuming its your support for them that drove you to this program.  I’m sure I’ll never be privy to the whys..but I know that there are other ways that your dollars could have been well spent.

And the rest of the  major and minor sponsors put a lot of funding behind 3 days of women acting more like classic conventioneers, than women. And to what end? What are these companies gaining that they don’t already have in the “femme” blogging realm?  What deep “niche”  insights are you looking to gain from this gaggle.  Yes you’ll have a captive audience. And yes the Word Of Mouth Marketing on your “brand” will be  exponential. (After all, everyone uses laundry detergent, and almost everyone reading this has a cell phone, a computer of some sort and a connection.)For a short time.

Then what? What happens when Bonnie blogger goes back to middle America, husband, kids and pets in tow. Back to diapers, laundry, work and carpools. And you’re forgotten, dear sponsors ?

For now you’re wine-ing and dining your new lover (s). When the affair is over…you’ll want to go back to your tried and true partners. The ones who spend money with you readily; who support your brand and openly  blog, twitter and otherwise contribute to the WOM on your brand because they truly believe in you. Not because you’ve given them some bling,  a few cocktails and taken them to your room for a night of  revelry.

Maybe the sponsors should just purchase a few thousand Fezzes , bring in some go carts and have a parade.

It would be about as effective.

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