Mad Men Gone Dad

Editors Note : 2010 has been declared the year of the ‘Daddy Blogger’. I’m declaring by proxy that it is the year of the Stay At Home Dad. Reuters reported that in July 2009, 1 million families had a wife working outside the home, a child under 18 and an unemployed father. This is how they cope, overcome and moreover succeed at being a stay at home dad, in a world full of stay at home moms. This is their story.

The mailman here likes me. Really likes me. I am the key to his job security. And so, whenever there’s a kraft paper or brown box mailing container He  brings them to the door. The usual polite conversation ensues and with the curiosity of a child he asks what I’m reading today. You see over the past years living here we’ve discussed everything from The Noticer to Reality Check and everything in between.  On this day, the delivery came from my mother’s home town and until I looked at the full mailing address I wasn’t sure.  And then I chuckled, I’m reading Sugar Milk!  The puzzlement on his face was clear as crystal and though I wanted to let him in on it right then, I told him that I’d share the book with him after I’d read it.

After glancing through the bills, opening the book package and attaching the infafmous sticky note on the cover, I checked the email beast (great day, only 150 spam notices today)and set out to conquer my day.  Conference calls scheduled for later in the day were cancelled and rescheduled, coding work looming large, I switched on the ‘big box’ pc (yeah i’m still a pc) and while waiting for the thing to load my latest project um crash, I picked up the copy of the book. Cute cover I thought. Inside, carefully tucked into the center of the book, was a press pack, I read it. Thinking that book publicists are all alike, they have this down to an art, this is gonna be another one of those hype filled presentations, with no substance. I’d asked for this, I thought. And oh dear Lord, how was I going to make it through this read. I headed for the treadmill, book and water in hand.

What followed, was a morning of sheer joy, raucous laughter and some sideways looks from the office staff where I work out attempt to walk off the stresses and get some cardio in the pass. I literally read the book cover to cover in the hour and a half I spent at the gym. I soaked in every nuance, tidbit of snark, ache of depression and isolation and true view inside the word of a newly entrenched stay at home dad’s trial by fire. Certainly not a Mr. Mom (I hate that reference to SAHD’s) and far from lazy, Ron shows that dads are NOT the bumbling idiots that media often portrays (read  Ed Bundy, Homer Simpson, at infiniutm ). Rather, he shows that dads (despite their lack of a mothering gene) are more than capable parents in solo. Willing to offer the same compassion and consolation to their offspring’s hurts. And that the sterotypical man at home in boxers, stuffing pizza and swilling beer is far from reality.

I first made the acquaintance of Ron Mattocks, the pen behind Clark Kent’s Lunch Box, after seriptiously reading his post on Why I Hate Danny Evans. Danny is the author of the wildly revealing Rage Against the Meshugenah: Why it Takes Balls to Go Nuts and the man be hind the pen at Dad Gone Mad. I found in Ron’s post   a man, a dad, a certain vulnerability not seen much around my house and I was intrigued. I think I read his blog from pencil to post that day and I’ve read him ever since. Ron is a regular contributor to Houston Family Magazine and has been a featured freelancer  at the Good Men Project, Babble.com and more.

Ron went from the marketing and sales office of a high powered home builder to being a stay at home dad in the blink of an eye. (It really happens that way in the real world folks) His wife,  Ashley lost her job the same day. Oh yeah, that’s the fickle finger of fate! The couple contemplated a home business, freelancing. But, within four months, Ashley had secured full time employment. Ron, had not.  And so began the chronicle of his day to day existence as a stay at home dad.  Executive meetings now replaced by breakfast table quarrels, mountains of  laundry.  Its a brave new world for any man, to become the stay at home partner, let alone the step dad to two girls, one of whom will certainly become a member of the US ambassadors corps and one of whom is certain to be the next  Gilda Radner.  Though he seems to fumble through the routine at first,  Ron  emerges, a veteran and a role model for certain to other SAHD’s who think they’re alone.  Wit and wisdom abound through the struggles and triumphs, the parent teacher conferences, piddle puddles, and the demon Care Bears. (they really are the spawn of satan).

You can connect with Ron through his Facebook and Twitter accounts as well as follow his triumphs at Clark Kent’s Lunchbox. I know once you read him, you’ll keep reading him. You can also meet Ron, and garner some inside information at the M3 Summit, September 9-11 in Atlanta GA, where he’ll be presenting a session directed to getting your book published and transforming your blog into a book. His book, Sugar Milk: What One Dad Drinks When He Can’t Afford Vodka, is available at Amazon.com in a variety of formats, including Kindle.

Disclosure: I was provided a copy of this book at no charge from the author/publisher for review. Some links may include links to purchase of  the book from my own store.

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